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Explore mindful communication, swearing with intention, and authentic self-expression with mindfulness experts Barry Boyce and Pat Rockman.
Mindful communication involves being intentional with our words while staying true to authentic self-expression. It balances:
- Emotional honesty
- Context awareness
- Accountability for impact
Mindfulness practitioners Barry Boyce and Pat Rockman challenge the stereotype that mindfulness requires constant calmness. Key insights:
1. Breaking the "Nicey-Nice" Stereotype
- Mindfulness isn't about suppressing emotions
- Authenticity includes frustration, anger, and yes—even swearing
2. The Mindful Vulgarian Paradox
- You can be fully present AND drop an F-bomb
- Swearing becomes problematic when unconscious, not when intentional
3. Emotional Regulation ≠ Emotional Suppression
- "I'm never going to be that calm, blissed-out practitioner" - Pat Rockman
- Mindfulness creates space for ALL emotions, not just peaceful ones
1. The Intensity Awareness Check
- Notice your volume/tone separate from your words
- Ask: "Is my delivery matching my intention?"
2. Contextual Responsibility
- Leadership roles amplify your words' impact
- Power dynamics affect how messages land
3. The Repair Process
1. Recognize harmful communication
2. Investigate what happened (without self-judgment)
3. Make amends where needed
4. Adjust future communication
Even seasoned practitioners:
- Sometimes write people off temporarily
- Use mindfulness to later investigate:
- "What triggered me?"
- "What might be happening for them?"
- "Is this actually about me?"
"Mindfulness propagates a specific way we're expected to behave. We wanted to challenge that." - Pat Rockman
"Everybody's an asshole—it's just that some are your friends." - Barry Boyce
"Intensity has its own impact, irrespective of words." - Pat Rockman
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