Helping Kids Overcome Negative Self-Talk

What Is the Critical Critter in Children?

Have you noticed your child saying things like:
- "I’m not good at this"
- "I’m so stupid"
- "It’s all my fault"
- "I shouldn’t have even tried"

These are signs of what I call the Critical Critter – a playful way to describe a child’s inner critic. By giving it a name, we help children separate harmful self-talk from their true selves.

Why the Critical Critter Matters

Left unchecked, negative self-talk can:
- Lower self-esteem
- Create avoidance behaviors
- Hinder learning and growth
- Reduce resilience

How the Critical Critter Works in the Brain

Using Dr. Dan Siegel’s brain house model:
1. Upstairs Brain (Neocortex): Where thinking, planning, and creativity happen
2. Downstairs Brain (Limbic System): Where emotions and instincts live

The Critical Critter starts small but grows by feeding on:
- Negative self-talk
- Harsh criticism from others

5 Ways to Help Kids Shrink Their Critical Critter

1. Name the Critter

• Helps children separate from negative thoughts
• Makes self-criticism easier to recognize

2. Take the BFF Test

Ask: "Would you say this to your best friend?" If not, it’s Critical Critter talk.

3. Answer Back

Teach comebacks like:
- "That’s enough, Critter—I’m doing my best"
- "I can’t hear you—I’m busy being amazing"

4. Call for Backup

Encourage seeking help from:
- Teachers
- Coaches
- Supportive friends

5. Create Positive Moments

Daily practice:
- Name 3 things that went well
- Focus on small wins

Building Long-Term Resilience

By helping children recognize and quiet their Critical Critter, we:
- Boost self-compassion
- Encourage growth mindset
- Develop emotional resilience

Start these conversations early to give kids tools for lifelong positive self-talk.